EXPERIENCING DOUBT

A surprising number of friends who were raised as Christians have confided to me or have stated publicly that they have experienced a period of doubt and soul-searching, if you will, regarding their belief in God.  In some cases the friend has overcome her doubts and gained a renewed faith in God.  In others she has come to the conclusion that she no longer believes in God.

Speaking personally, my experience was somewhat different.  I had lost my belief in God by my junior year of high school.  I do recall a particular incident, a point in time that I have previously written about, when I realized that that had happened.  But my sense was that it had already happened, not that it was just then happening.  Moreover, I don’t recall any period of questioning or doubt leading up to that point.  

So I am most curious about the experiences of others who have had periods of doubt, and I would be interested in learning about those experiences.  Here is a series of questions that I have:

1. How and when did you become aware of your doubts?
  
2. Did your doubts have more to do (a) with a particular disappointment or other event in your life, (b) with the particular church or congregation with which you were affiliated, or (c) with an intellectual incompatibility between your religious beliefs and your view of the world? 

3. Was this a gradual process that included further investigation or did it seem to arise all at once? 

4. Did you have an internal dialogue or debate that helped you to resolve your doubts?
  
5. Did you consult with others to help you through this process?

6. Was there a particular event or understanding or realization that served to resolve your doubts?
  
7. In resolving your doubts did you feel that you were making a choice, that you were in control of the resolution process, or did you feel that the ultimate resolution was somehow compelled?   

I realize that some individuals consider such matters to be private, not something to be shared publicly. Others may feel comfortable sharing some aspects but not others.  That’s totally understandable.  But some may feel that their experience is fundamental to who they are and that they would be happy to share that with others.  Regardless of your comfort with expressing these matters, I do believe it is a helpful exercise in introspection and self-knowledge to ask yourself these questions.

© 2019 John M. Phillips